


Wings Of Freedom

by somethingscarlet13



Category: Attack on Titan, snk - Fandom
Genre: Cute things, M/M, Reunion
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-04
Updated: 2016-06-04
Packaged: 2018-07-12 06:55:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,479
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7090495
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/somethingscarlet13/pseuds/somethingscarlet13





	Wings Of Freedom

All these deaths were reminding Jean of Marco again. All over again. He had been a fool to join the Survey Corps in the first place, and had sworn to himself not to get attached to anybody when he did end up joining anyway, but then Marco had been there for him. Been there when nobody else would, been there and picked him up when he was down. Marco had really helped him realize that the idea of him being a leader wasn’t really that unrealistic. Marco washad been one of the best, and only, friends that Jean had ever known.  
And now he was gone. gone like the summer wind, gone like the tide, g one like all the others.   
If it had been possible, Jean would have given Marco his very own funeral. But personal funerals ended when the Titans first appeared and Jean didn’t even know if those ashes he had held so tenderly were even Marcos. They could have been anyone. But there was really know way to tell.  
The gates opened. The remaining members of the Survey corps returned from the expedition. Everyone could see the expressions of the soldiers. Terror. You could see nothing but absolute terror. The normal shouting began from the villagers.  
“What was the purpose?!”  
“How many died?!”  
These were all questions nobody could answer, not even Erwin could answer their questions. Even today,Commander Levi was more grim faced than usual. He hated pointless death, and this time he really wondered, W hat did we accomplish?  
But Jean, Jean was at his limit. He had seen enough death and destruction at the hands of the Titans. His entire squad, wiped out by a single Titan. What’s worse, the Titan looked so happy. They always looked so happy. Death, smiling right at you.  
The yelling died down, and the crowd dispersed. Jean returned his horse to the stables and said goodbye to Armin, Eren, and Mikasa. He couldn’t be more jealous of that damn Jaeger guy. Either way, he couldn’t stand the fact of seeing anyone, he just needed to be alone.  
But the images, they just wouldn’t leave him alone.  
He thought he saw Marco during the expedition. A Titan, no more than sevenmeters tall, with the face of Marco. It charged right at him, and he couldn’t move.  
“Why... why can’t I move my legs?”  
At that moment, Reiner sweeped in and grabbed him by the side, and took him away. He looked back only to see a terrifying face, d efinitely not Marco’s.

Then during the yelling. He saw the hallucination again, jumping around in the crowd, waving its hands hand? And it only had one eye, what was that? That was not the same as before, or the same as the body... “ Just ignore it.” He thought to himself.  
As he began to walk home, he heard the parties of families and friends, celebrating the returns of the soldiers.  
He also heard the crying of families and friends, far more sobs then cheers. Jean looked down. He couldn’t take it. Every time the same thing. Did humanity really think them brave? Or just wasting time and lives?  
He walked on, staring straight ahead, blocking it all out. All of it out, let his mind shut down and “Jean!”  
Snapped out of his happy place, Jean snapped his head around to see that damn illusion again. Of the boy, around his age, eyepatch and a stump of a left arm. The other side of his face was just fine. Just fine and....familiar.  
Freckles. Brown eyes. Short cropped brown hair. And that grin, that stupid grin.......  
Marco?  
Jean immediately mentally slapped himself for the thought. Marco was dead. He was the one to find the body. The horrible memory hit him like a tidal wave and he swallowed back vomit at the horrible images that haunted him at all times, that he could never escape from.  
But the damn hillusionshion was now shoving through people to reach him, and it damned looked real......  
For the first time since he could remember, Jean let himself feel hope. Two seconds later, he squashed it again.  
No. It can’t be. Marco’s dead. He’s dead, he’s dead, he is dead dam “Jean!”  
No. I’m just hearing things. Seeing things. J ean lowered his head from his halitionation, the seventh one in the past five days, and turned to leave. N o more. No more of this. I’m sick and tired of it.  
“Jean! Hey Jean, slow down!” The hallucination laughed behind him in an attempt to make a joke.  
J e a n o n l y w a l k e d f a s t e r . I g n o r e i t . J u s t i g n o r e i t . H e ’ s d e a d . M a r c o ’ s d e a d .  
“J ean!” Now it sounded angry. Jean walked faster, practically running.  
Go away go away go away. You’re dead. Stop haunting me.  
He was suddenly spun around and pulled to a warm figure that was only hugging him with one arm. “Hey,” the body's voice said softly in his ear, “I’ve missed you.”  
A warm body, hugging him tightly, the hallitionation of Marco with only one arm and an eyepatch......  
“.....Marco.......”  
The body gave him a squeeze. “Hi Jean.”  
The realization hit Jean like a ton of bricks and he took a few steps back to see if it was really true. Surely it couldn't be true.  
“Who are you?”  
“Oh come on, Jean! It hasn’t been that long has it? Its me! Marco!”  
I m p o s s i b l e , t h e r e w a s n o w a y . H e ’ s d e a d , h e h a s t o b e d e a d ! I c h e c k e d t h e m a n g l e d b o d y  
myself, that body was leaking blood everywhere and the other half was nowhere to be seen!  
But Marco was alive. His right sleeve was tied into a knot where it had been bitten off and he was wearing an eyepatch on his right eye, but he was still the same Marco.  
It was as if someone had just punched Jean in the gut. In a good way. A good way, but still, this was M arco. The friend he thought he had lost had just returned from the dead.  
Jean tried to hide his face, to hide the tears of relief and joy that were coming in tidal waves down his face, collecting on his chin, and then falling to the dirt, but they just kept on coming and there was nothing Jean could do to stop them.  
Like an awed little boy discovering something for the very first time, Jean reached out one trembling hand towards Marco’s face. W illwill it even be ok for me to touch his face? Maybe I should ask first?  
His hand only halfway outstretched, Jean was about to draw back when Marco pushed the right side of his face into Jeans open palm. “See? I’m really real.”  
Jean didn’t reply, just stroked the side of Marco he had lost. That they had both lost.  
With trembling fingers, Jean lead his hand across Marco’s cheek, chin, then back up to where his eye was.  
Shaking like a leaf, Jean pushed back the eyepatch and it noiselessly fluttered to the street. Jean didn’t flinch once at the lost side of Marco, gently placing his hand over the empty socket.  
The tears were still coming, and they seemed to get worse the more Marco proved to be real and alive. Jean slid his hand down to Marco’s side and the stump that had once been and arm.  
“You......You're alive.” Marco nodded, and suddenly Jean was a broken record. “You’re alive, you’re alive, you’re alive, you’re........you’re......” God damnit, he couldn’t stop crying.  
And Marco, sweet, notdead Marco, just pulled him into another hug, letting Jean cry on his shoulder while he petted his hair with his remaining arm.  
And then he kissed Jeans forehead.  
Jean froze, the tears stopping. He looked up at Marco, who was now blushing under his freckles. “Like I said,” he said quietly, “I missed you.”  
The tears were slowing now, and as Jean wiped them away, sniffling, he grinned. “Yeah. Missed you too.”  
Now It was Jeans turn to kiss Marco. He leaned in and kissed him just once, just gently, before stepping back. “So. Now what happens?”  
Marco looked down. “That’s what I came here to talk to you about. I really n eed to explain things, so here’s the story: Right after I got back, I found out you guys had all gone out on an expedition! I had no way to contact you! And do you really think they’d let me go out in titan territory when I can’t fight anymore?”  
“Then answer me this, how are you even still here?! I saw your body!” Jean interrupted.  
Marco shrugged. “Even I don’t know that. There was a titan,it got me, then blackness, and then I  
woke up with this half of me here.” He gave Jean a bittersweet smile. “Anyway, Jean, I came here to tell you something.”

Jean nodded, not letting go of Marco’s one good shoulder. In fact, he was still hugging him, his arms around Marco’s half lost/half healthy waist. “Yes?”  
“II’m quitting.” When Jean opened his mouth to protest, Marco help up a hand to silence him. “It’s the logical thing to do Jean, you and I both know that. I mean, look at me. A soldier can’t fight his very best with............disabilities.”  
“Marco........”  
“No. This is my choice Jean. I came here today to say goodbye.”  
Goodbye.   
How many times had Jean said that every night in bed, every day while fighting titans, while trying to live his own life, trying to reach closure?  
I came here today to say goodbye. No. Jean wouldn't allow it. Not again. “Fine. But I’m coming with you.”  
Marco’s one eye went wide. “Jean, you can’t!” His expression hardened and he looked right at Jean. “Theses people need a leader. Remember what I said before about you being able to relate to the week? I meant it in a good way. Most leads can’t relate at all to their soldiers because they’re years of training ahead. But you are at the same level of all these guys. You trained with them, you k now them. T hat’s what makes you a good leader, Jean.”  
Jean swallowed hard, feeling the threat of tears again. “Marco........please..........don’t go. I can’t lose you. Notnot again.”  
Marco leaned in and hugged Jean once more before taking a step back. “It’s ok. I’ll be fine. And whenever I see that there are tians anywhere, I’ll know I’ll be safe because one of the worlds greatest leaders, Jean Kirstein, is there.”  
The boy’s locked eyes. Then, as if attracted by some invisible magnet, they kissed once more. This one was longer that the other Jean had done. It was bittersweet with unspoken messages held in it. I ’m here. I’m fine. It’s ok. Thank you. A nd most importantly: I love you.  
The kiss ended and with no more words to say, Both young men each turned to go their own way.  
But three steps back and there was something Jean had to do. He spun back around and ran after Marco. “Marco! Wait!”  
Marco turned around to see Jean running towards him. When he reached Marco, Jean reached up to his neck and unlatched his forest green cloak, his symbol of pride and honor, before tossing it over Marco’s shoulders and doing up the clasp.  
“This should have been your to begin with,” Jean said, straightening up. “And now it’s on who really deserves it.”  
“Jean....”  
“Keep it. It’s yours now.”  
Marco smiled widely and made a fist with his left hand, placing it over his heart. “I know this isn’t the correct way to saloote someone and I apologize, but Jean.........thank you.”  
And before Jean could reply, he had left.  
*******************  
It was almost a month after Marco had retired and ever since then Jean had been fighting the titans for a different reason. The reason was still Marco, but now it was to keep him alive rather than to avenge.  
The Survey Corps were going out on another mission into titan territory and were all waiting, on horseback, in front of the gate, waiting for it to open it’s big metal mouth and let them free.  
Jean sat upon his horse and waited eagerly. T his is for you Marco. B ut not just Marco. This was also for the hundreds of people who were all gathered to see them off. The hundreds of people who looked up to and relied on not only him but all of the Survey Corps.  
This was one of the first expeditions where he was actually happy. He didn’t have to worry about avenging Marco at all, he just knew that if he wanted everyone to be safe, he would need to defeat the Titans, one way or another! Not just for Marco, but for all of humanity.  
Jean surveyed the crowd, each face, while he waited for the gate to open. There were young children, old men, families.........and Marco.  
Since Jean was busy with the Survey corps, he couldn’t go and v isit Marco, But the two wrote back and forth constantly, each telling the other about their new life.

Jean lit up at the sight of his friend seeing him off. Again. Marco never missed one of these things, and he was always there when they returned to, eyes scanning the crowd until he saw that Jean was back safe. Right now he was was even wearing the cloak Jean had given him nearly a month before. He doubted that Marco ever took it off, and the thought made him smile.  
Marco calt Jeans eye and waved enthusiastically. Jean waved back and mouthed “h i”.   
The sound of grinding gears made him automatically snap to attention and Jean turned to see  
that the gate was opening.  
All the soldiers began stampeding out into the open and Jean followed.  
T h i s i s f o r y o u M a r c o . S i n c e y o u c a n ’ t f l y o n y o u r o w n , I ’ l l b e y o u r W i n g s o f F r e e d o m .


End file.
